


shrouded memories

by ErjaStark



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Domestic Boyfriends, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, M/M, Photographs, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-25 02:54:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22008787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErjaStark/pseuds/ErjaStark
Summary: He finds it hidden between the wall of the bookshelf and a thick dictionary that looks like it hasn’t been touched in ages.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 12
Kudos: 133





	shrouded memories

**Author's Note:**

  * For [silver_drip](https://archiveofourown.org/users/silver_drip/gifts).



He finds it hidden between the wall of the bookshelf and a thick dictionary that looks like it hasn’t been touched in ages, which isn’t surprising, given that no one is still in need of Latin these days. At least, Tony isn’t. The only reason he has moved it in the first place is because of the promise he has given Steve to clean the room - a promise he is regretting more and more by the second. 

Frowning, Tony turns away from his momentarily abandoned task to further examine the small polaroid. It’s old; that much is clear. Steve all clad in a military uniform gives that away - as does the woman standing next to him with her arm wrapped around Steve’s waist. She's also wearing a uniform, though hers slightly differs from that of the man beside her. 

Another giveaway are the bright smiles on both of their faces, Steve's smile is full and unbothered with no dark lines concealed underneath it. He still smiles but not like that; never like that. His smile is a reflection of all the pain he has suffered through to get to this point in life, all the battles he fought, all the wounds he endured, all the losses he took. It doesn’t mean that it’s any less genuine but it’s different nonetheless. 

The happiness captured in the photo fascinates Tony, his fingers tracing along its edges as he continues to stare. Even his scarred and hardened fingertips, roughened by years of soldering and crafting, can make out the various crinkles and dogears. It almost looks like it has been carried around in a pocket for years before reaching its final destination between the books and old wood - or like it has been crumpled up in the past. 

“Tony?” Steve’s voice pulls him out of his trance and makes his head snap up just in time to see the man entering the door, a smile on his face. It doesn’t look like the one in the photo. “Already grown tired of cleaning, huh? I shouldn’t have been surprised. I mean, the state of the workshop alone gives me a pretty good idea on your definition of-” 

The words are cut short when Steve’s eyes land on the object Tony is holding, his mouth still opened but no sound leaving it. He takes a step forward, hand reaching out even though he’s nowhere near enough to grab a hold of the polaroid. “Give me that.”  
  
Despite having done nothing wrong, Tony feels guilt creeping up his spine. Steve looks panicked, eyes wide and full of worry - and he's caused it. “I-- I was just looking at it, Steve,” he explains in a quiet voice, pulling the polaroid closer to him. “I found it in the bookshelf and you look really pretty in it and-”  
  
“Give it here.” The fear on Steve's face gives away to desperation as he crosses the room as fast as possible without actually running, hand still outstretched and waiting. Coupled with the soft “please,” it’s enough to break Tony’s heart. 

“Alright.” He hands Steve the photo, letting go of it as soon as the other man’s fingers curl around one of the corners. The sinking feeling in the pit of Tony’s stomach only worsens when he watches Steve pull the picture close, observing it intently. “I haven’t done anything to it, Steve. I swear.” 

Does he really come across as jealous enough to tear apart treasured memories of Steve just because he isn’t part of them? Tony knows that he can be quite an ass more often than not but that’s a line he’d never cross. 

Steve either doesn’t hear his words or simply doesn’t believe their sincerity and continues his analyzation, fingers ghosting over every single part of the photo at least once, probably more often.

A painfully silent minute follows until Steve is apparently satisfied that nothing has happened to his prized possession. Slowly, his hands drop down, both still clutching at the photo like he’s scared it’s going to be snatched away if he’s not careful enough. 

When Steve’s piercing blue eyes meet his brown ones, they are filled with as much guilt as Tony feels. “I’m sorry,” Steve whispers after a moment, sounding like there is something stuck in his throat that’s making it hard for him to breathe. “I know you didn’t do anything to it. Of course, you didn’t. My mistake.”  
  
“Did you actually?” If Tony was smart, he’d let the whole thing slide and go back to the cleaning he’s done so little of - and usually, he _is_ smart when it comes to everything but this. People have always been his weakness ever since he was a kid. He’s never learned how to not say the wrong thing in the wrong time, despite everyone trying to teach him so throughout his entire life. It’s frustrating. 

On the other hand, it gives Tony the chance to blame the following words on that particular problem of his. “Because it sure looked like you thought I was seconds away from ripping that photo apart right in front of your eyes.” Trust isn’t something that comes easy to him and it hurts more than he’ll ever admit, saying those words out loud. 

What hurts more, however, is watching the person he loves flinch back upon hearing them. “I didn’t think that.”, Steve whispers. Tony’s heart beats once inside his chest. “Not really. Maybe. I-- I’m sorry, Tony.” Another beat, this one louder to his own ears. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Steve spins around before he can say another word, disappearing out of the room and leaving Tony behind to watch his stiff backside as he does so. He wastes no time in taking off after the man. He’ll be damned if they are going to get into a fight over some picture that he doesn’t even care about.

At least not like Steve thinks he does. 

Tony finds him in their bedroom, sitting on the perfectly made bed, still looking at the photo in his hand. Steve doesn’t move as he approaches him, though his eyes dart up to look at him. That’s good, Tony thinks hopefully. He can work with everything that doesn't involve Steve running away. 

“You value that picture, don't you?" 

Steve's reply is sincere and warm - just like the man himself. "I do." It’s obvious and Tony doesn’t mind, not in the least. Now, if only the man sitting on the bed could see that as well. “It doesn’t mean I don’t love you, Tony. I do; so much. You have no idea.” Tony believes it all because there has never been a reason for him to not do so. Never. “The woman is-”  
  
“I know who she is.” Steve’s surprised look when he lifts his face makes Tony smile. “I’ve met Peggy numerous times when I was younger. Dad and she seemed to be good friends. We talked a lot when she visited. She was nice and encouraging where my father wasn’t.” He sits down next to Steve, head turned so he doesn’t lose the hold he currently has on the man’s gaze.

"Steve, I know that I'm not the first person that you have loved - and you are not the first person I have loved. Thankfully so. I can imagine that our lives would have been rather miserable if we didn’t have people we deeply cared for before we met each other. Well," Tony chuckles but it lacks to deliver any sort of amusement. “More miserable than they already are, I should add.”

It’s not funny; not in the slightest but Steve still laughs. The sound is as devoid of actual delight as his own was but Tony still counts it as a win. It’s the lives they have chosen to lead, being in constant danger, scared what the next day might bring them, never able to catch a real break.  
  
But they have each other by their side throughout all of it - and Tony wouldn’t trade the life he has right now for anything else. He smiles and Steves smiles back. That darkness in his face is there as always but in these moments, these few seconds of peace and quiet that only belong to them both, Tony likes to imagine that it’s only a distant scar that Steve has almost forgotten about. It's still they when you look closely but it doesn't hurt him anymore.

He doesn’t know how the polaroid ended up this broken and crumpled but Tony knows better than to ask. He simply takes Steve’s hand in his and gets up from the bed, pulling the man with him as he does so.  
  
“Come on, we must have an old, unused frame lying around here somewhere. The photo is too nice to go to waste in its current spot.”

Steve hesitates, watching him in uncertainty. “Tony, you don’t have to-”

“I know. I _want_ to, Steve. That’s kind of an important difference. Like I said, it’s a pretty picture and you look damn good in that uniform. Any chance you still have that old thing lying around here somewhere?” He also regrets never having gotten the chance to put up a proper picture of Peggy before but admitting that will most definitely spoil the kind of happy mood he has somehow managed to set. 

Steve shakes his head in exhaustion but Tony can see the frown disappear from his face. “You’re unbelievable, do you know that?” His voice is too soft to be taken seriously; something both of them know. He presses a kiss to Steve’s cheeks, lips lingering there for a moment.  
  
When Tony pulls back, he winks at Steve with all the cheek he can muster up. “Of course I do and you wouldn’t have me any other way. Now, back to the task. Frame - what do you say; blue or black?”

“Do you even know if you have one in those colours?”  
  
“Nope but I’m really feeling the blue one. I guess we have to go shopping.” 

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is actually the first stony fic I've ever written. Hope it isn't too much of a disaster and that you enjoyed it!


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